11 ways to make exercise feel more like play

And why this framework can be such a…game-changer (get it?!)

Photo by Jametlene Reskp on Unsplash

Today’s newsletter is brought to you by Xago, which is sort of a joke because Xago is my husband’s project and he’s not paying me anything for this! (Rude.) But he’s so cute (see below), and more relevantly, Xago is very cool, and I’m proud of how much thought, passion, and time he’s put into it, so it’s a real pleasure to try to bring some more attention to it and help him succeed. Any support would mean so much to both of us!

Akshay holding the first official manufactured Xago tile! (Hence the celebratory beverage) (And yes, I know, his hair is absolutely iconic)

Xago — pronounced “zah-go” — is a tabletop game based on hexagonal tiles (get it, hexagon??). It only takes like 30 seconds to learn how to play, which is good if you’re like me and your brain starts to make the dial-up modem sound when someone explains a game to you, BUT it’s surprisingly complex and entertainingly challenging for all ages.

Akshay (that’s my husband) invented the game more than a year ago, and has spent the intervening time perfecting the rules, experimenting with materials, playing probably thousands of games of it with friends and strangers alike, and finally finding a manufacturer to make fancy, professional sets of the game. Now, he’s got a Kickstarter you can support and become one of the very first people to own an official set! I’m not a big game-player, but I genuinely enjoy Xago, and if you like games even at all, I know you will too. Plus, the tiles are really cool (they have magnets!) and feel so nice in your hand. Just a lovely, tactile, pleasantly brainy, screen-free experience.

You can order a set or two (or more!) via Kickstarter, and please share with game-loving friends and relatives. The campaign was fully funded within 36 hours, but that’s at least partly because Akshay probably set the goal too low, lol. (Relatable.) Plenty of sets still available!

Thanks so much for your support!

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So yes, as a non-game-player (other than Xago!) and a non-sports-person, I’m not actually sure my normal approach to movement is all that playful. (As Akshay likes to tease me, I “hate fun.”) I do my strength work, and I use Pilates, cardio, and conditioning to support and complement that, and I just kind of get in and get out, and get it done. I enjoy it a lot (obviously!), and I get cranky and achy when I don’t do it, but it doesn’t usually feel much like play.

That’s a missed opportunity, because play (and gaming) is such a helpful framework for fitness, for a few reasons:

• Having fun is a good enough reason to play a game: In fact, it’s the whole point. You don’t have to win to enjoy yourself! (Unless you are my six year old.) If you lose, you still had fun, and you might learn something new or even just build a tiny bit of grit. In movement spaces, we can often get caught up in metrics and benchmarks — so it’s really helpful to remember that just showing up, just moving, is the much more important point.

• When we try a new game, or play against someone who’s really good at it, it can feel intimidating at first. But we still try (again, the play is the point!). Often we develop some new skills that we can implement next time — and every once in a while, we actually score a point that felt impossible, or maybe even win. I don’t have to tell you that being new to the gym, or trying a new movement, modality, or skill, can be really intimidating, too. But if you haven’t had the experience of doing it anyway and surprising yourself by what you’re capable of, my god is it a good feeling. There’s almost nothing more empowering.

• Play is one of the most important developmental tools in childhood: It teaches kids problem solving and creativity; it improves mental health, emotional regulation, and even academic performance. Active play helps children build their motor skills as well as physical health (think heart, lungs, muscles, bones!). The same really seems to be true for adults and play, and our physical activity time is an excellent place to incorporate it.

• As Meredith Sell pointed out earlier this week, fun builds intrinsic motivation, which is a major key to consistency with exercise.

I asked you all how you make exercise feel more like play, and I loved what you had to say:

“By tapping into my childlike silliness. I love to rollerblade, it makes me feel so free & I just laugh and laugh the whole time. Laughing at & with yourself is the best medicine to reconnect with little me <3” — Michelle of What's Up in NY This Week, a new friend I met at a Substack event last week. We talked about her love of rollerblading there and it’s part of what got me thinking about all of this!

“I used to hold tight to my runs and strength training but now, in addition, I experiment with different kinds of movement that can be playful and fun or simply give me a chance to connect with myself & others! I do ecstatic dance with a group of women, go for long bike rides with my boyfriend when it’s sunny, attend a hip-hop dance class with friends, and take a Qigong workshop led by an old friend of mine. I focus less on outputs and more on experiences and allow myself to be imperfect and messy and it helps a lot!” — Amie Newman of This Is Not Your Mother's Eating Disorder

“If I’m listening to some really great music — especially music that holds a lot of nostalgia for me — I can really have so much fun with it. It’s like it unlocks a younger version of me that used to be more playful. Always could do with a bit more of that in these preschooler-wrangling days!” — Nadia Neophytou of New Mom Run Club

“Pole dance and aerial classes! I’m actually a pole dance instructor. I also take adult beginner ballet. Giving myself opportunities to move in fun, unique ways has done wonders for my relationship with exercise.” — Belle Chanson

“Find something actually fun to do! For pilates and yoga, I make time after following a class for some free play and doing whatever my body feels moved to do.” — Xue

“I bought a bunch of soft headbands with weird and colorful patterns on Etsy, and I use them to hold back my hair during workouts. They always make me smile.” — dolqueil

“It’s the music or the company for me! I love to dance a little between sets of weights if I’m solo and the playlist gets me. If I’m with someone, I feel like the focus becomes connection and banter instead of my heart rate.” — Maureen

“Put on Pink Pony Club. Works every time.” — Cait Van Damm of Adventures in vaginas (and other parts)

“As a fellow non-sporty, gym class hating kid, I started regularly working out in my mid 20’s thanks to “Derby Lite”- a group skating class based on the principles of roller derby. I had no idea exercise could make me feel like that (happy, motivated, proud, I could go on). 15-ish years later I am still grateful for learning that and developing a positive relationship with moving my body as a result.

“I might be abnormal but I think doing hard things can be a lot of fun. I like pushing myself to hit (reasonable) goals and the progressive overload approach you suggest here has fit in nicely with that. Of course wearing fun clothes (I’m talking neon socks, tanks with unicorns that say “dismantle the patriarchy” etc.) and listening to good music while working out helps too!” — Marie Loewen

Thinking about play, and reading through all of these great answers, made me realize that FUN is actually a huge reason why I’ve stuck to the bootcamp-style class I started taking at my neighborhood gym a few months ago as a way to work more cardio into my routine. The class is absolutely nuts, just so heart-poundingly difficult, that there’s always a point when I can’t believe I’m subjecting myself to it. But. But!!! The instructor, Jennifer, is like joy personified: Her cheering and enthusiasm makes you feel like you’re the world champion of EMOMs. She plays the best music and sings, beautifully and LOUDLY, while banging out endless burpees. She does special theme classes for holidays! She makes you laugh, and even when you’re groaning and rolling your eyes over what she’s asking you to do for the next set, you get to do it with the exerciser next to you who’s just as daunted as you are (whether they’re 25 or 80) — that shared eye roll always gets me through. It’s like you’re on a team, pushing yourself to the brink together as you play a tough game.

And guess what: You win every time.

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Thanks again for indulging me in this tiptoe into (unpaid ((lol)) sponcon. Here’s that link to the Xago Kickstarter one more time: Back it, share it, enjoy it! Can’t wait to hear what you think of the game.

xo
Anna